The Face of an Angel...who WILL kick your ass.....

Sometimes I wonder if there is a sign across my forehead that reads: "Interested...Please tell me your life story."

I went to the grocery store the other night and I threw on my Metro State sweatshirt, threw my hair up in a ponytail and walked outta my house looking kinda scary! I was standing in line trying to get some dinner at the deli and this older man was in front of me. I wasn't paying attention to him because I was trying to figure out what I wanted to eat. He said "Oh, so you go to Metro State?" I kinda looked at him like...how the hell do you know that? He smiled and pointed to my sweatshirt and I had to laugh cuz I felt silly. I told him I did. He asked me what I was going to school for. I told him I wanted to be a teacher and of course, naturally his next question was to ask what grades. I told him I wasn't sure yet but was toying with 2nd, or 5-7th grades. He said...ok good. No high school for you. He proceeded to tell me that he thought I was too small to teach high school and what if they disrespected me? I told him I give respect but get it as well so I think I'd be OK if I decided to teach HS. At this point it's my turn to order so I do. The older gentlemen walked away and the guy at the counter heard and said he went to Metro too. We did the small talk and I feel a tap on my shoulder. It's the old man who came back to talk to me! He told me if I decided to teach HS to be careful and he wished kids could still be paddled in school like back in the good old days. I have to admit, so do I, but that's a discussion for a different blog :) So this older man wishes me luck, I thank him, bid him a good evening and we go our separate ways.

So last night I went to see Poppa who is in a rehabilitation center inside of a nursing home. He has to be there for 3 months so I try to get over there to visit him as much as possible. As I'm walking out, I'm thinking in my head how to write a paper and am totally engrossed in myself. I have to walk by rooms of the people who reside in the nursing home part and it breaks my heart. I vow to myself then that my father WILL NOT live in one of those places. If I have to mortgage my house, sell my car, or become a drug dealer to have enough money to keep my dad at home, then so be it. I know those are strong words but they are true. Anyhoo....I see this older lady kinda wandering around the hall. I'm still thinking about my paper and my daddy but I smile at her. She stops walking around but starts walking towards me. She reaches her hand out and says: Help me. Of course I stop. I'd have to be a cold-hearted bitch not to. I will admit to certain people I am super cold-hearted but to children and the elderly I am not. So I stop and I ask her if she is OK. She tells me that she needs help with her husband. She had asked one of the nurses for help but that "bitch just walked out of here and I haven't seen her since then and my husband still needs help!" I smiled when she said the word bitch. This little old lady had spunk! I said....Ok, let's find some help. Just then, she mumbled something but I couldn't understand what she said. She kinda wandered off from me and kept mumbling. I followed for a bit and kept asking her if she was OK. She turned around to look at me but looked so confused and it was at that point that I realized she had some form of dementia. I wanted to cry as I watched her walk the halls.

I get that often. People randomly coming up to me, talking to me, opening up to me. So Colorado Boy has a cousin named M who is normally quiet, I guess. We were at the hospital together and she told me all about her trip she has just taken and all the activities she did on her trip. Co Boy said she never talks to anyone so I should feel good that she opened up to me.

I was walking home late one night and saw this teenage girl who was crying. At first I walked past her and smiled. She was so young that I immediately turned around and asked her if she was OK. She said no and started bawling. I immediately went up to her to give her a hug and at first was super standoffish. As I hugged her, she melted in my arms and sobs racked her body. I tried so hard NOT to cry. After about 5 minutes of her crying she told me this guy who she was with ditched her. She had no idea where she was at, how to get home cuz she had no cell phone or money to call her mom, or how to reach her friends. She asked me for money to take a bus home. When I asked her if she knew HOW to take a bus she started crying again and said no. I took out my cell phone and told her to call her mom and that I'd wait right there with her for her mom to come. She called her mom and of course her mom was frantic as all hell. This girl (I can't remember her name) handed me the phone so I could talk to her mom. Her mom was crying and asked if I would stay with her daughter and I said I wouldn't dream of leaving her alone, downtown at night. I told her mom I lived nearby and if it were OK if her daughter were to come to my house and wait there. I gave her my full name, my phone number, my address and told her that I wasn't an ax murderer. Her mom agreed and about 30 minutes later came for her daughter. As I fed this little girl I asked her how long had she been wandering downtown alone? She said she had stayed in that spot crying for an hour. She had men coming up to her trying to pick her up (EFFEN GROSS) and in that hour I was the first person who didn't look crazy (?!?!) or scary and that I had the face of an angel. (I wanted to ask her if she was high, but since she was all of 16 and already traumatized, I held my tongue).

I've had so many encounters like this that I could write a book about it. There were teenagers who I picked up on the freeway (sorry daddy!) and when they came to my car, they said: THANK GOD!! Finally someone who isn't a weirdo! (Wait...I thought I WAS a weirdo!) When I dropped them off at their destination they wanted to pay me but I told them to just pay it forward.

I doubt I have the face of an angel, but If I do, don't get it twisted. I will kick some serious ass if I need to!! I have to admit there is something weird with me that makes perfect strangers comfortable enough to open up to me. I'm hoping that I can take this gift to my classroom. I want my kids to feel comfortable enough to open up to me. I hope that I am strong enough, wise enough to know what to say, how to react and find the right solution to problems that may arise. I hope that people I talk to know that I genuinely care for them, even if they are strangers. We do have a human connection, and as long as they aren't bad people, that's good enough reason for me to stop to listen or help them.

Too often we are are so caught up in our own selves that we tend to forget people around us. There was a story of a man, from NYC, who was having a heart-attack. People were STEPPING OVER AND AROUND him as he lay dying. One man stopped and was so upset that people didn't give a shit. What kind of society have we become that we see someone who is clearly in need of help but we are too busy to give a damn?! I hope I never become that person.

Smile at someone today while you're walking down the street. You never know. It may just make their day!