Ice Cream Whore

This past week has been such a blur!! Wow...I've been crazy busy every single night of the week, and every one of them has been super good for me, but the 2 nights that stand out the most are Wednesday and Thursday.
Wednesday was Nate Night. We've both been feeling kinda down in the dumps so we decided to have a movie and cry night. I got to his house and I was starving so he fed me this concoction that he called "chicken enchiladas'. Hmmmm...being the snobby Mexican that I am I was like hell no I'm not eating that! It looked quite scary! But he made me try a bite and surprisingly it was really good! We ate 'em up with some chips and it was quite delish! Then we headed out to rent a movie from blockbuster and ended up getting The Hulk. While drooling over Edward Norton, Nate asked "Do you think he lets anyone call him Eddie?" Somehow I can't see Edward letting anyone call him that! We stopped at the store for some ice cream and Red Vines. Nate suggested Dublin Mudslide for me to try. That is now my favorite ice cream for the moment!! Since we were going to drool over Edward Norton we decided that some wine would be appropriate. While I was paying for this good Shiraz I looked over and saw Boon's Farm Fuzzy Navel on sale for $1.99!!! Holy Crap!!!! But to my dismay, Nate wouldn't let me buy any... . With all our crap in hand, we returned home, opened the bottle of wine which turned out to be great and then Nate had an epiphany: lets drink the wine thru our red vines!!! Man, was that delicious!!! After the first glass of wine we ate some ice cream and watched our movie. It was exactly what I needed: a visit with a friend who understood me. We didn't have to try too hard to have a good conversation. We could be our normal goofy selves. There were no pretenses. Just 2 people having fun!
Then last night was Grey's night. My friend Jamey came over cuz we are obsessed with this show as well. Usually we watch it together but if we can't we text each other all night during the show! I picked him up and made him go with me to Fascinations...sorry Jamey! There's nothing like going to a porn store with a male friend, huh? Now for all you sicko's out there: I was only there for some pasties. If you dont know what they are, I'm not explaining them to you! So...we went home and I had the munchies, so I brought out my ice cream. Yes, I shared my ice cream that I had the night before with Nate, with Jamey. It was so great just to lounge around in sweats, watch Grey's, laugh over the characters and share some ice cream! I needed to be dragged out of my funk and both guys came to my rescue. I love friends!

The X Effect

Man, these past few weeks have been super fuckin crazy! I go bowling with some friends in an out of the way bowling alley and run into the x....let's call him Kooba. Akward!! We spoke a lil bit then we both left. Then on Saturday...what a production. I go dancing at my favorite spot only to see Kooba yet again. I almost fell apart at the club, so instead of doing that, I called my knight in shining armor, Nate and asked him to take me home. He pulled up on his white horse and rescued me from the evil x. But.....the x has been texting. Saying things like I still miss you, I'm not over you, I still love you and I was the most happy when I was with you. Do I dare believe that? I don't know what to think. My heart is happy beceause I truly loved this boy, but my head says Hell no! Don't go down this road again. He has been in my thoughts since we broke up. The hurt slowly went away, but he remained there like a tumor in my brain that is inoperable. What do I do?!?

I'm not the One.....

I watched Grey's last night and was almost insanely jealous of Meredith. Her man, Mc Dreamy is the perfect guy for a girl like Meredith. She has so many hang ups, so many doubts, so many ill-conceived thoughts of what a relationship is or isn't, yet there is her rock, Mc Dreamy. No matter how many times she freaks out at their relationship, he calmly moves her hair out of her face, takes her face in his hands, and tells her to take her time, then says he loves her and calms her fears. Everytime! He has the patience of a man, who sees the potential that Meredith has. He sees the diamond in the rough that she is and is determined to stay by her until she sees herself as he sees her.

What happened to men like that? Where are they? What happened to loving a woman for who she was, not for the sexual ability she had? I'm so tired of men for that. Um, if i wanted to fuck you, I would. I'm tired of guys saying things that they think I want to hear, instead of being honest.

I've known this guy *Greencard (I'm protecting the names of the fuckin idiotic just because I'm nice.) for about 3 months. I stay pretty busy because I like to stay busy. He'll always text me and say, so any plans for tonight? First of all, if you really wanted to spend any kind of time with me that didn't include the horizontal position, you would have called way ahead of time and tried to schedule some time. Secondly, why the hell are you texting me at 9 at night to see if I'm busy?? Really??? Greencard just text me asking if I had plan today and it's semi-early so I won't rip into him too bad, but when I say I do, he says......wait......wait for it....."i'll miss you tonight." ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?! I wanted to absolutely scream at my phone, but it's not my phone's fault so I take a deep breath and did what I do best: be a bitch. I sent him a text back that simply said I'm not the one. I'm not sure if he'll understand that but I'm really not the one!! I hate men that say what they think I want to hear. Most of my friends know that I'm not your average woman. Take what most woman like: flowers, cards, candy and toss all that shit out the fuckin window. Don't give me flowers because you fucked up or because you feel like you have to. I'll throw them away. I don't like candy so I'll just end up giving it away. I'd have so much more respect for a man that said, Hey Rae, I just wanna fuck. Not that I'm gonna fuck you, but at least you're honest and up front!! Fuckin A!!! Whisper sweet nothings in another bitch's ear cuz this one has heard it all already.

Now let's talk about the *Baby. This fool is like 19 years old and thinks he can "holla" at someone like me. Again....REALLY??? What could you possibly have that I want or need?? Come on!!! He constantly texts me, and I don't ever answer them. Why hasn't he gotten the fuckin hint? How many times can I say, I don't want anything from you?? I honestly think he's masochistic. This fool never gets answered back, he always gets sent to vm, yet he is still persistant!!! Say it with me....EW!!!

I'm just fed up and like my friend Nate said, I really sometimes wonder why I even try anymore! I want a cross of Edward with a dash of Derek. Someone who is going to take the time to get to know me.......does that exist anymore??

Ahhhh

So I somehow stumbled upon Blogger.....I'm not really sure how, either. Am I ready to post all my thoughts online for the world to see?