Opened Doors.

I'm on a high....I went to a luncheon yesterday at a school here in Denver that teaches dual-language. So by the time the kids leave elementary they are fluent in English and Spanish. This is exactly what I'm looking for. To help my gente get ahead in life. To show them that there is a way of life other then manual labor like our parents. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but to show them it's ok to want better.

I emailed the principal and asked her if I could help out. She said yes, there is a girl who is struggling in English and could I tutor her. Now, I haven't tutored before so I'm a little nervous about it, but my first hurdle to tackle was Janine. I nanny a sweet boy from 3:45-6. That entails picking him up from school, helping him with homework and maybe feeding him if he's hungry. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to do both at the same time, that maybe Janine wouldn't want to share me. So I took a leap of faith and asked her if she minded if I did this. I would be willing to take Will with me to tutor. She emailed me back saying, please do this. This school is amazing and I want you to take this opportunity to get some school experience. She is amazing!!

So I start next Thursday. Again, I'm a little nervous but this is a new exciting chapter in my life. I'm actually getting to do what I want to and that's to teach children.

Killer Bunnies

This weekend has been pretty chill. I spend Friday night on the phone with my great friend Nate discussing life. I have been stuck on wine for a while now and the really nice guy at our liquor store recommended a red to me that I absolutely love. So I suggested it to Nate. Now, this red is classy and I was QUITE disturbed when he said, I think I'll try it while I'm playing some WOW. I almost wrecked my car for my outrage!!!!! :)

I learned a new game this weekend: Killer Bunnies. I'm addicted. Seriously addicted. It's so bad that I dreamed of the stupid game on the first night of playing it! This game can be so vicious and that's part of the fun. I was laughing so hard I almost had tears the first night, but then last night it wasn't so funny....I was so hurt at the move my friend did in the game to sabotage me, I had tears in my eyes. Of course he laughed so hard he snorted, which made me only more sad! I thought at that point, this is ridiculous that I'm tearing up over a damn game. But even in his sabotaging, I still won the game....again!! Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!!!!

It's snowing pretty bad out now and I wish I were snowboarding, not stuck in this office. But I'm grateful for a good job, so I won't complain....much. I'm wishing that I had a bf to come home to on snowy nights....where dinner would be ready (chili or something hot) and we could snuggle while watching movies......

Birthday Tizzy.......

Yikes....it's been quite a while since I've blogged. I've been out of town, busy and out of touch....so let's get caught up. I went home for Christmas and New Years. It was everything I wanted it to be. So much so, in fact, that I have decided to move back home to Cali. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have made up my mind. Cali baby, here I come! I'm very excited about this decision. I have peace with it and though I'm going to miss tons of great friends that I have made here, I'm done with Colorado...or the "ca-ca hole" as my dad calls it!!!

I went snowboarding with some friends this past Wednesday and kicked ass. It was the best I have ever, ever done. Maybe it was because I had a great instructor, or maybe it was because I just quit thinking and let my body react. Whichever it was, it worked cuz damn!!

I'm in a weird spot personally though.....I'm not sure why. No, that's a lie. I do know why. Next month is my birthday, I'll be a year older and no where close to where I wanted to be. But I really have no one to blame but myself. I'm working on things but Prince Charming is no where to be found, that bastard. Maybe that's my fault too. I'm just so fuckin picky!! I want a man who is extremely strong and won't mind putting me in my place (I need that every now and then) and who will speak up his damn mind. What's so hard in saying, Rae, you pissed me off today and this is why???? Is that really so hard?? I want someone with tattoos and who loves them like I love them. Someone who will understand that I can go from greatest woman in the world to bitch in .01 seconds. (And he'll still love me.) Someone who will snuggle with me when I occasionally need it. Someone who will understand that for the most part, I'm not a needy girl. I can handle my own and I deal with my issues on my own by re-treating into myself. Someone who will understand that me doing that isn't personal. This is just how I function. Someone who will understand I might want a baby one month, then the next month it's out of the fuckin question. Someone who loves to snowboard but will move with me to Cali...... Can I bio-engineer this man???? I don't need him to save me, cuz I don't need saving, but just someone to be with....to love....forever.

It's 9ish and I'm here at work to distract myself from my mood. I've been so good for the past month but this stupid impending birthday has me in a tizzy. Stupid birthday. No, that's not being grateful that I might see another birthday....stupid me for letting myself be in a tizzy over my birthday.